soooooo...its been a while :/
i guess things have been a little hectic recently. although ask me on any particular day and i'll tell you i have nothing to do tehe.
things havent really been that different. me and J are still seperate, barely talking to each other recently which has GOT to be a good thing...right? M fell through...i lost internet for a month and the first time i log back on he turns round and tells me..."Sorry, i met someone...."
yeeeeeah....fanks!
R got a fella, although things are looking a bit tense =S hmmm
well, im sat in my normal spot in Beech Corridor. . .staring at the recycling bins and listening to the sweet sound of C eating lunch...errrr...yeah xD oh and i need to mention L before he hates me forever...XD
its only something like 63 days till christmas...this would be good...if money wasnt such an issue right now.....:/
P and V are here!!! my gorgeous wifeys!!
i better go and let P have her laptop back before she bans me from using it D:
Stars, Hearts and Kisses
Kat
xxxxx
Thursday, 22 October 2009
Sunday, 4 January 2009
theres no place like home...
there really, really isnt....
so its a new year...the big 2009 hmm, only one more year to go till im 18 [i dont care what anyone says...i am NOT looking forward to it]
anyway, the last four days have been.....interesting. since New Years eve ive been stuck in yeovil with my grandparents, normally not a problem....but FOUR DAYS!!!
by the end of my stay i was ready to commit vehicular manslaughter...[now..if only i had a car Hmmmmmm]
my Nan wasnt a problem, she keeps to herself mostly, doing what needs to be done without saying anything, but every little task my Grandad did had a running commentary and excuses for when it went wrong. im used to this by now, its always been the same since like...i was a foetus [hehe foetus] but it gets a bit annoying WHEN IM IN ANOTHER ROOM!
im not even kidding.
ah well. it was good to get away from everything, at least for a little while although i must me honest...i missed M
thats another thing that has happened. i finally plucked up the courage to walk out on J. i cant belive how much power he actually held over me, i feel completely different now im not stuck. but ive met another guy, M. its taken me a long time to open up but im healing and im starting to trust him not to hurt me and i was surprised at just how much i did miss him...hmmm....
right, enough of the serious stuff. Steve is staying with us for a bit which means mum is euforically happy. its both sweet and sickening at the same time. but sickening as in...too much sugar hehe. shes acting like a giggly 17 year old, and i should know, im surrounded by them lol. its good to see her so happy again. i cant remember the last time i saw her smile so....bright.
ah well, i spose i better stop rambling soon...otherwise its going to look like i dont have a life [actually i dont, but thats not the point lol]
so its a new year...the big 2009 hmm, only one more year to go till im 18 [i dont care what anyone says...i am NOT looking forward to it]
anyway, the last four days have been.....interesting. since New Years eve ive been stuck in yeovil with my grandparents, normally not a problem....but FOUR DAYS!!!
by the end of my stay i was ready to commit vehicular manslaughter...[now..if only i had a car Hmmmmmm]
my Nan wasnt a problem, she keeps to herself mostly, doing what needs to be done without saying anything, but every little task my Grandad did had a running commentary and excuses for when it went wrong. im used to this by now, its always been the same since like...i was a foetus [hehe foetus] but it gets a bit annoying WHEN IM IN ANOTHER ROOM!
im not even kidding.
ah well. it was good to get away from everything, at least for a little while although i must me honest...i missed M
thats another thing that has happened. i finally plucked up the courage to walk out on J. i cant belive how much power he actually held over me, i feel completely different now im not stuck. but ive met another guy, M. its taken me a long time to open up but im healing and im starting to trust him not to hurt me and i was surprised at just how much i did miss him...hmmm....
right, enough of the serious stuff. Steve is staying with us for a bit which means mum is euforically happy. its both sweet and sickening at the same time. but sickening as in...too much sugar hehe. shes acting like a giggly 17 year old, and i should know, im surrounded by them lol. its good to see her so happy again. i cant remember the last time i saw her smile so....bright.
ah well, i spose i better stop rambling soon...otherwise its going to look like i dont have a life [actually i dont, but thats not the point lol]
Saturday, 1 November 2008
depression and why its not fun
here i go again, crying for no reason. maybe its the fact that its raining so hard its almost like the sky is weeping, maybe its the face people seem to see the world through rose colored specs or maybe, just maybe, its the HUGE pile of things to do, but due to this damned bug i have no ebergy to do, but know that if i dont im going to die at the hands of a disgruntled mother lol.
at least i have R staying the night, to stop me doing anything stupid [again] the other scars have only just healed, id rather not have to deal with more just yet. B went home because her mother [the poison dwarf as she is known to many] thought we were doing maths work lol.
as it stands i have sorted things out with J [the other half] so am cheering up slightly, now am listening to savage garden and flirting shamelessly with a friend of R's, mainly because she is uncapable of knowing whats going on in a post-virginity brain lmao.
anyways, tea is almost ready and ibe moaned enough for one day =)
hopefully next time it will be on a happier note
at least i have R staying the night, to stop me doing anything stupid [again] the other scars have only just healed, id rather not have to deal with more just yet. B went home because her mother [the poison dwarf as she is known to many] thought we were doing maths work lol.
as it stands i have sorted things out with J [the other half] so am cheering up slightly, now am listening to savage garden and flirting shamelessly with a friend of R's, mainly because she is uncapable of knowing whats going on in a post-virginity brain lmao.
anyways, tea is almost ready and ibe moaned enough for one day =)
hopefully next time it will be on a happier note
Friday, 31 October 2008
an average morning [well almost.....]
The alarm shakes me into consciousness for the third time this morning. If I don’t get up this time, I will miss the bus completely. Mum will not be best pleased. The last thing I need this morning is Mum yelling at me again;
“In less than a year you’re going to be 17, it’s about time you learnt some responsibility...rant, rant, etc…etc…”
Pulling the duvet back I recoil as cold morning air replaces the warm bubble I created for myself in the night. Its mornings like this I wish humans could hibernate.
I wish good morning to the animals; it’s not like they can understand a word I am saying, but it makes me feel better. Raising my blind I see the pre-dawn light shining on the new fallen snow, making our [admittedly overgrown] garden seem like a sugar coated wilderness, brand new, awaiting exploration. Normally I would ask to stay at home so I could investigate the powdery softness, so harsh yet so comforting. But today is too important.
Ok, so its’ nearly December and we were told there was going to be snow in September, but as my Nana tells me [far too regularly] “Better Late than Never”
I avoid falling over the cats again [I still have a bruise from yesterday’s incident] then stumble into the bathroom and run the shower. I contemplate feeding the cats, but it will waste time I’m not actually in possession of. And besides, Mum will feed them when she gets up to take my brother to school.
The heat of the shower caught me out again, causing me to step backwards onto a loofah; thereby kicking my leg into the air, only to land a few seconds later on the bottom of the bath with a slump, suddenly finding myself slightly lower, a lot soggier and considerably less happy. Oh, and with an additional bar of soap on my head [don’t ask because I just don’t know…]
I finish in the shower quickly; I see no point in hanging around contemplating my navel. As far as I'm concerned, the shower is just a formality to be dealt with swiftly and easily as possible. Baths on the other hand, are a different matter….I'm well known in the house as the only person physically capable of remaining in the bath for more than two hours. I would stay in all day if I could…Unfortunately there is an unseen force at work insuring I never get the chance…its name? Mum.
Wrapping the towel around me, I wrestle a pile of clothes, work a door that hates me and try to stay upright due to cats weaving themselves around my ankles despite being dripped on by shower water, I make it back to my room and…fall flat on my face. Who put the pile of washing there?! [I know it was me, but that’s not the point…who’s side are you on anyway?]
Today is not going to be a good day.
Dressing in yesterday’s jeans and a top from the pile on the end of my bed, I shove something resembling clothing on before grabbing my trusted jumper from the chair and running down the stairs two at a time.
Awww man! Now the dog wants attention. I unlock and open the back door so he can go out. While he’s sorting himself out I grab an apple and inspect the cupboards to see if anything edible has materialised overnight. Nope, there’s nothing. Out of the corner of my eye the clock reads 07:17…I'm late! Again! Calling the dog in, I close the door and head for the front. As soon as I close the front door I have to turn around and go back in the house, to pick up my college bag [oops!]
I shout a goodbye to Mum who is just waking up for her busy day ahead. She shouts back a reminder that she has to go out tonight to see Nana, so I have to return early in order to watch my little brother for the evening.
Not paying a lot of attention I shout an agreement and leave once again. Pulling my phone from my pocket I select the music for the walk…something fast I think; to match how fast I'm going to have to run to get there in time.
i should probably note that this doesnt happen every morning...its just a bit of fun
“In less than a year you’re going to be 17, it’s about time you learnt some responsibility...rant, rant, etc…etc…”
Pulling the duvet back I recoil as cold morning air replaces the warm bubble I created for myself in the night. Its mornings like this I wish humans could hibernate.
I wish good morning to the animals; it’s not like they can understand a word I am saying, but it makes me feel better. Raising my blind I see the pre-dawn light shining on the new fallen snow, making our [admittedly overgrown] garden seem like a sugar coated wilderness, brand new, awaiting exploration. Normally I would ask to stay at home so I could investigate the powdery softness, so harsh yet so comforting. But today is too important.
Ok, so its’ nearly December and we were told there was going to be snow in September, but as my Nana tells me [far too regularly] “Better Late than Never”
I avoid falling over the cats again [I still have a bruise from yesterday’s incident] then stumble into the bathroom and run the shower. I contemplate feeding the cats, but it will waste time I’m not actually in possession of. And besides, Mum will feed them when she gets up to take my brother to school.
The heat of the shower caught me out again, causing me to step backwards onto a loofah; thereby kicking my leg into the air, only to land a few seconds later on the bottom of the bath with a slump, suddenly finding myself slightly lower, a lot soggier and considerably less happy. Oh, and with an additional bar of soap on my head [don’t ask because I just don’t know…]
I finish in the shower quickly; I see no point in hanging around contemplating my navel. As far as I'm concerned, the shower is just a formality to be dealt with swiftly and easily as possible. Baths on the other hand, are a different matter….I'm well known in the house as the only person physically capable of remaining in the bath for more than two hours. I would stay in all day if I could…Unfortunately there is an unseen force at work insuring I never get the chance…its name? Mum.
Wrapping the towel around me, I wrestle a pile of clothes, work a door that hates me and try to stay upright due to cats weaving themselves around my ankles despite being dripped on by shower water, I make it back to my room and…fall flat on my face. Who put the pile of washing there?! [I know it was me, but that’s not the point…who’s side are you on anyway?]
Today is not going to be a good day.
Dressing in yesterday’s jeans and a top from the pile on the end of my bed, I shove something resembling clothing on before grabbing my trusted jumper from the chair and running down the stairs two at a time.
Awww man! Now the dog wants attention. I unlock and open the back door so he can go out. While he’s sorting himself out I grab an apple and inspect the cupboards to see if anything edible has materialised overnight. Nope, there’s nothing. Out of the corner of my eye the clock reads 07:17…I'm late! Again! Calling the dog in, I close the door and head for the front. As soon as I close the front door I have to turn around and go back in the house, to pick up my college bag [oops!]
I shout a goodbye to Mum who is just waking up for her busy day ahead. She shouts back a reminder that she has to go out tonight to see Nana, so I have to return early in order to watch my little brother for the evening.
Not paying a lot of attention I shout an agreement and leave once again. Pulling my phone from my pocket I select the music for the walk…something fast I think; to match how fast I'm going to have to run to get there in time.
i should probably note that this doesnt happen every morning...its just a bit of fun
Thursday, 30 October 2008
The Irony of Friends
I've decided;
life should come with an instruction manual.
hahaha some would say that takes the fun away from learning as you go, but from where im standing...it would make things a whole lot easier =)
im not a bad person, i know i have bad points, but then, who doesn't? if people show me that they are worth it, i have all the time in the world for them. take R for example, shes annoyed just about everyone i know, but i keep going back to her. i dont know y. there is something about her.
ha! that makes me sound like im dating her....hardly....shes far too....loud. lol.
not to mention my bf....
the latest saga? goes something like this..........
as my friends and family know [and are probably far too aware of...] ive been ill recently [big "awwww" everyone...] and ive been asking for company because everyone seems to be far too busy to be comforting lol. the other day R cancelled on me, saying that she couldnt be bothered to come see me because it was cold and she was snug at home.
ok, not very fair i know, but i was too bust feeling sorry for myself to do much about it.
that was last week
then, just today, she cancelled again. going round hers was the only escape from wintery glumness that is home at the moment. no offence to Mum or C, but its boring here. but Mum hates R so there is no way i would be allowed round to see her out of the blue, as far as people know im still not tlkin to R unless i have to, not after last time [story for another day methinks]
so i asked her to come and give me an excuse, but guess what......she cancelled again =(
o look, and now another friend is trying to do something stupid that i warned them not to and thinks it will be ok to come running to me again when it goes wrong.
i think im going to leave it there before i start ranting like a madman
[that would make a change...]
life should come with an instruction manual.
hahaha some would say that takes the fun away from learning as you go, but from where im standing...it would make things a whole lot easier =)
im not a bad person, i know i have bad points, but then, who doesn't? if people show me that they are worth it, i have all the time in the world for them. take R for example, shes annoyed just about everyone i know, but i keep going back to her. i dont know y. there is something about her.
ha! that makes me sound like im dating her....hardly....shes far too....loud. lol.
not to mention my bf....
the latest saga? goes something like this..........
as my friends and family know [and are probably far too aware of...] ive been ill recently [big "awwww" everyone...] and ive been asking for company because everyone seems to be far too busy to be comforting lol. the other day R cancelled on me, saying that she couldnt be bothered to come see me because it was cold and she was snug at home.
ok, not very fair i know, but i was too bust feeling sorry for myself to do much about it.
that was last week
then, just today, she cancelled again. going round hers was the only escape from wintery glumness that is home at the moment. no offence to Mum or C, but its boring here. but Mum hates R so there is no way i would be allowed round to see her out of the blue, as far as people know im still not tlkin to R unless i have to, not after last time [story for another day methinks]
so i asked her to come and give me an excuse, but guess what......she cancelled again =(
o look, and now another friend is trying to do something stupid that i warned them not to and thinks it will be ok to come running to me again when it goes wrong.
i think im going to leave it there before i start ranting like a madman
[that would make a change...]
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